A buddy of mine got a new golf bag for this season.
Last weekend a Bear took a liking to it.
Hilarity ensued. pic.twitter.com/iNFoKATTrp— Rob Johnston 🇨🇦🎧🎵 (@Robbie_J) August 1, 2023
We’re back on bears today with this video is making the rounds. It might be time to add some bear spray in the bag for any future mountain rounds.
What do you even do in this situation? I mean, it’s a bear you guys. I hate it about the guy’s golf bag but you’re not gonna win a 1v1, you can’t make the whole thing worse by trying. If a bear is actually dead set on stealing your golf bag then I think you just gotta let it take it into the wilderness and have its way with it. Better the bag than your life, in my opinion.
What a bear would ever want with a golf bag is beyond me. One of life’s great mysteries. In my experience, bears don’t play golf. Only thing I can think of is that there were snacks in it, most likely a jar of honey.
RIGHT BRAIN: If we’re getting ambitious here, the bear didn’t look that big and theoretically you have a golf club to defend yourself. Maybe a few love taps on the skull and it lets go. I’m definitely not condoning animal abuse, just some firm pecks to nudge it back to its nest. Maybe it retreats. It’s also possible that it comes after you. Worst case, I like to think I’m getting back to the cart to flee.
LEFT BRAIN: I guess you could say the “worst case” here is serious injury or death. You run the risk of encountering an angry bear, which is far more problematic than having to buy another new golf bag. Maybe the bear gets pissed and mauls you and eats your organs right there on the tee box, who knows? The range of outcomes with regards to facing off against a bear that’s mad is mostly on the “negative” end of the spectrum. Sure, this bear wasn’t the biggest, but it’s still stronger than you. It is, after all, a bear.
The fact that it was a relatively new purchase for this poor guy makes it even crueler, but he wisely cut his losses. He also shouted at it a few times as if that would help, but he was in a state of shock. You go to the shop to invest in a new vessel for your sticks and never for a second imagine that a bloody bear will end up stealing it off the back of the cart. Thankfully, the clubs appear to have mostly come out before the bear dragged it into the depths of the bush, so it wasn’t a significant monetary loss. Should you decide to go after that bag, you’re putting yourself in the less-than-ideal position to get mauled like Leo DiCaprio’s character in “The Revenant”. The verdict: it’s best to just let the bear have the bag.
